Wow.. Sometimes I just didnt realize this day would come so fast... Friends really do come and go.. and it is espeically sad for me because after the end of this year, I probably wont see him again for a while.. It starts from just an ordinary friend, and he was pretty quiet when I knew him, then he moved in to my apt and became my roomate. Even though he did bring a lot of dramas but what really kept me going from all the stresses from school are thos drama he brought. I was always the outsider that listened to him dramas with his girlfriends.

I m back to Redlands today and somehow I just couldnt sleep. The reason I m back to Redlands because another friend of mine is graduating tomorrow morning, and I m supposed to sleep right now so i can wake my ass up to attend his graduation. My roomie M, he is here today because he knew my other friend who is grduation as well. I dont; know its my lonelyness start to kick in or what.. maybe its because all my friends are going back to Taiwan this winter break and i m left alone here, I somehow felt that I m feeling sad for the first time my roomie is leaving about a month away.. he was always being my listener in a way, I pretty much told him everything, about my stresses, future goal, girls, and such such, and we pretty much play pool and bball together. Now I have realized something, evevn tho its selfish in away. I realized that how about when I m depressed or wanted to go shoot some pool, who am I gona go with now??? I am so used to having M pretty much do stuffs with me for a year, and now he is packing his belongings and ready to shipped to Taiwan for the rest of his life, once he leave, this friendship could probably comes to the end.. This is very sad for me, its a feeling that hoping this day would never come but in reality is that sooner or later he will be outta my life..

Also today I went to kareoke with couple friends of mine, well, how am I gona put it this way, most of them are very young and still undetermined what are they gona do for thire future which is understaning because I was pretty lost in my frist year of college life, and also some of my friends are the same age as me but still dont know what are they gona do after they graduated... Maybe its because I recently hung out with ppl who are undetermined, I felt that I am under a lot of peer pressure becuase of that. Sometimes I asked myself Should I continue hang out with them and have some funs correalted with my studying time or just being a straight nerdy ass guy and study all day?? Its really confusing... I know that its time for me to move on and make new friends who are in the same page as me but in a way that I kinda dont wana let my old friends go. My engineering friends who graduated on June pretty much go on their separeted way and they are very focused as well, thats why I was able to overcome the stresses, but now I am a Bio guy now, a whole new chapter for me. I have to start over fresh and get to know people who are in the same page as me...right now I still havent find one group that is very determined yet..

I guess my college career in Bio is different than in engineering. I guess I have to open up myself more and get to know more people... I shouldn't always thinking to go out and have fun, I should stay focused all the time, but the action is harder than saying it...

I dont get it nowadays,

so lets say if you and me become a close friend, so then you can just say whatever you want to my new friend. I didnt even talk shit or intentionally talk shit about you, and now because we are "friend" so you can just say whatever??? I am so pissed off, you better own me an apology. Yes, I have know you as a friend for a while, i even let go some of the shit you talk shit to me about, but i had enough. You fucking better apologize to me.

Damn....... I don't know what just happened........... My roomie M dumped his ex for lil green. As you know M and lil green are not together because some reasons (from previous entry).... M told me that he is happy that he dumped his ex because they were not getting along all these time.... BUT, after M dumped his ex for 1 week and a week of beer drinking, M's ex , G, is here at my apt, inside my roomie's room, door closed, lights off, perhaps sleep together like the old days when they were together.......

I guess M is back with G again....???

This is so complicated....

Wow... its really hard to predict what girls think...Last nite, me and my roomie M and other friends went to knotts scary farm, lil green sticked with me and my roomie all the time espeicially with M. M tho they had something going on so finally made a confession with lil green tonite. M realized that lil green still hasnt forget about her ex and wanted to get back wit him this winter when she is going back to Taiwan. From what I saw last nite, the interaction of lil green and M are so perfect, seems like two love birds. However, the reality destroyed everything tonitel, but aint all bad things. Even tho M back home alone but me and M all realized that we are all grown up, there are so much more important things lie ahead of us, lil green is a good friend but also just a girl we knew 4 weeks ago. There are still plenty of opportunities around us when we achieved to a greater goal.

In the end, I conclused that when girl slept over, dropped by often, calling on the phone frequently do NOT mean she likes you, she might just see you as a very close friend... aka (BFF-BESET FRIEND FOREVER) 

End

Hey readers

Its been a while I updated my xanga, so here I am releasing my thoughts here again. So past few days has been really dramatic, well. where should I start all this. Three weeks ago, me and my roomate met new friends from playing bball with new friends, one of them is a girl. What so speical about this girl is that she is so not typical girls that just sit on the sideline and watch guys play, she actually played with us and pretty darn good. The most important is that she is pretty cute as well.

So after the bball game, one of my friend "D" lived really close to the park where we played ball, so he invited everyone to have dinner at his place, so all of us ,6 people went. We pretty much just chilled, by the end of the dinner, D invited the everyone and the bball girl "lil green" to played pool, but we were too lazy so we stayed to watch the movie instead, and D is convincing lil Green to go, so somehow she went... and we were tired from all the bball so me and my roomie "M" left.

Here is the fun part, the next day, everyone seems all anxiously wanted to invited lil green to have lunch. While i was eating lunch with my buddies, D dropped by and said hi to me, and he told me he is gona have lunch with lil green. The invitation didnt stop there, the next day again, my roomie "M" called lil green to have lunch too. So pretty much everyone wanted to have lunch with her and here is where the drama really begun.

Anyway, i m gona make this story short. D started to call lil green constantly to go out chill with him. however seems like lil green is not that intereseted. My roomie "M", he had on and off gf for so many years, according my experience lived with him for a year, he loved to have two relationships in a same time. He recently just dumped his one of two gf. He seems not satisfy, he is make a move on lil green now. Very werid, somehow I had a little feeling for lil green as well, but I wasnt sure, all I know is she is very cute and good personality. I kept my feeling deep inside because right now I need to focus on my school, and aviod the unessecery dramas. So I m out of this dramatic soap opera.

Anyway, so then lil green, me and my roomie we just chatted on msn pretty frequently, but I aint wana be those guys to talked to her immediately whene she sgined on. I guess M did that a lot so they are pretty close nowadays. Closer than me and lil green which is alrite, cuz my intention was just to be friends.

Last sunday was my bday, the whole group went out and sing Kareoke and later we had dinner. While I had conversation with D, I asked him what type of girl he liked. Lil green was sitting opposite of him, he surprisly raised his two arms and pointed at lil green and said "this is my type" pretty loud. I was stunning by his reaction and my face looked like shit after he said that. Lil green also was shocked and replied "oh" quietly. The he continued to said I can take care you all that kinda bull shit. I was so pissed off I litereally want to kicked his ass. No on makes stupid ass confession in my bday dinner!!

Next day, my roomie M picked lil green up from school to our apt. We chatted a lil before I went back to school for lab. She said D was serious on that confession and she lied and said that she only like girls. D replied guys not allowed? She immediatly said NO! I was cracking up cuz D was trying too hard and get his ass rejected. My roomie played smooth nowadays, the most recent update is that the lil green is gona bring dinner tommorw to M. So far, I concluded, M is the winner right now, but the future drama is still unknow.... plus how is M gona deal two girls in the same time if M really gona go after lil green? Are D and M the only competition in this dramatic relationship wars? Why this shit always happened, is it because the uneven ratio of guys and girls caused all these dramas??  To be honest, i really dont know either...All i know is that the drama is start getting very very interesting...

To be Continued........